Entry 18

PANDORA’S BOX AND THE SHADOWS WITHIN

Everywhere was pitch-dark; I blindly searched for my phone and held it in my arms so the ‘real owners’ would not see the ‘sales!’ sign glowing from my bag and make away with it. That I did not have ‘BB’ pin to IM to friends did not mean I loved my humble regular phone any less.
Seated by the bar, I was wondering how on earth at this day and age they still had the heart to be ceasing light... and in a night club for that matter! Which kind temptation be that one? Who would they blame if person come ‘press spoil’? Buh, which way Nigeria, which way my country?!
Some guys were making noise at the far corner away from me trying to make up for the lack of music. I had to smile. I did not hear my phone ring, it was reading and counting by the time I put it to my ear but, once I heard “Tabby cat”, I did not need a caller ID to know who it was at the other end.
All at once, as though a dam had reached its elastic limit and burst open. I was overwhelmed by a flood of emotions. Joy, happiness, relief, anger, doubt, dread and something else, something vague... something I could not place a finger on.
"Caller ID: Max."
Max.
He asked if I was the sexy vixen seated all by myself at the bar. Said he was in town for the wedding of his buddy from secondary school and although he came for the ‘BE’ [the same one I was apparently attending] he was on his way to another venue. He spotted me on his way out of the club, said i was looking as bored as a widow spider listening to a politician campaign and decided to be my prince charming come charging to my rescue! He was waiting for me outside and asked me to come down so we’d run of to somewhere ‘more fun’.
Silly me, without a second thought, I found myself prancing towards the exits of the now lit [thank G*d for NEPA!] club.
When I caught a glimpse of my reflection on the mirrored doors of the entrance to the club, I stopped and turned away.
This was Max, the same Max.
Max that did not call me after all these months, Max that remembered me only when he had a pressing need, Max that believed I was a beautiful masterpiece created by G*d solely to help him with small favors, Max that surely would have heard about my accident and did not deem it fit to call.
Max.
The same Max that slashed open my chest, ripped out my heart and shattered it to a thousand pieces.
The same one that now had me acting like a show horse eager for a blue ribbon from the judges. I’d win it for him if given a chance, I would!
I shook my head to dispel the image of his smiling face from my mind and slowly made my way back into the club.
After a few steps, I stopped again.
If I didn’t see him now, I’d never know for sure. I would forever carry a torch for him with the believe that he is the best thing that ever happened to me.
No, i wouldn’t want that for myself. Whatever happened to my motto: NO REGRETS?
A cat has 9 lives right?
I made a dash for the restroom and studied my reflection in the mirror; perfect! I redid my makeup, brushed my hair and tightened the strings of my halter neck top. Wearing a confident smile, I walked past the glass doors and out of the club. Ready to face the reality of Max and bury this particular demon once and for all!
- TABBY