Entry 02

HUM TUM (YOU AND I)
So what?! I lied. Everybody lies. I don’t know what brought up the discussion or how Dr. Dash and Kufre became fasts friends but, whatever the reason, somehow, my age came up during their conversation although he didn’t correct him or anything (score one for the doctor), after Kufre left, Dash reported me to mother who in turn asked me why I was lying about my age. I didn’t give her any answer. First, I don’t know how it concerns them or if my actual age would reduce the price of rice in the market/ heal Mr. President buh! Whatever their reason, if they are not selling, I wouldn’t by. My age is mine 24, 18 or 21 its mine to do with as I please. hum they should be happy I increased the age. I know one or more women who reduce their ages on a regular basis and let’s not forget footballers, football age? buh!!
So, Kufre and I went to hang out at the plaza I can’t remember what it was that brought up the fight between us but, I remember that it wasn’t my fault. By the time we arrived at campus, I told Kufre that I wasn’t going to sleep at either my place or his place; I said I was going to the girl’s hostel to hang out. He was like, I was still mad at him but I told him I wasn’t I just wasn’t feeling him at that moment. Besides, every now and then, a girl needed her space. I can’t remember where I read or heard it [probably one of those Christian magazines] but, they said that a girl should learn how to differentiate between her husband and her boyfriend. So, after stopping briefly at my room to grab my toothbrush and change of clothes, I made my way to the hostel. On my way, I spotted Nneka [I hope she didn’t see me though] she was seated in the back seat of a ‘discussion continues’ Honda. I guess she was going for her one of her many weekend rendezvous [her and her numerous ‘oppressors’]. I got to the hostel and made my way to my friend Ivy’s room. Along the way, I reviewed the rules for surviving in the hostel. One; never walk close to the edge of the passage because if anything from the higher blocks should fall on you, you have yourself to blame. Two; as pretty as they may look, do not touch flowers, shrubs or tree branches that do not go past your waist because after dark, they make nice spots for taking a leak/ pissing and finally three; if from 9pm, you see varied assortment of naked female body’s lined on the passage hurriedly taking their bath, do not ask why; the bathroom is believed to carry diseases so, there is no way u’d expect a future mother of nations and wife of husbands to bath there and pick up some alien life form. Ivy was in the room!! After exchange pleasantries, I sat on her bunk while she made noodles for me. From the next room, I could over hear a quarrel that was taking place. Corner ‘a’ girl had snatched corner ‘b’ girls boyfriend and corner ‘b’ girl was saying it was payback for when corner ‘a’ girl stole her sugar daddy. There was more shouting and then other voices joined the fight. I looked at my wristwatch and gasped. How time flies! It was a few minutes to ten. Ivy had run out of pure water and if I didn’t hurry, the small shop in the hostel ‘common room’ would close for the day. I grabbed a handful of change and raced out of ivy’s room, past the quarreling roommates and towards the direction of the ‘common room’. Too late! As I approached, the cute but smallish looking guy that insisted I call him ‘sweetheart’ (he was in charge of the ‘common room’ shop) was locking the door to the shop. I dodged away before I was spotted by him that I told him ‘hi’ and ‘bye’ on more occasions than I pleased did not mean I was shopping for ‘little people’ to love. The shop was closed so, I’d have to go out of the hostel to the one of the ‘table display’ shopping centers. No problem. I strolled out of the hostel and walked in that direction. Luckily, they hadn’t closed so; I got water, onions and some biscuits and went back to the hostel. Proceeding to ivy’s room, I noticed some girls in the volley ball court that weren’t there before. Two were holding unto the next and shaking in prayer on was rolling on the floor another stood over her like she was in the process of exorcising her while the last sat on the floor, legs spread in front of her with her hands on her head. My first thought was to take a picture of the scene but a little voice told me not to, who knows if it was really ‘exorcism’ they were doing, the ‘thing’ could pass through the camera lens and jump into my body. I knew neither I nor my beloved boyfriend Kufre would approve of that. I continued my journey until once again I was seated on ivy’s buck. The quarrel in the next room had taken a different tone. Also the voices were different this time, the issue was that there was a suspected witch in the room and if she wasn’t scared, she should let them use a stick of broom to flog her. I folded my hands under my head and leaned back on the bed. Whoever said life in the hostel was boring and monotonous?

- TABBY